I bowled with Lou Rawls, I made Diana Ross laugh, I got fired by Charlie Sheen, I unknowingly stood behind Gwen Stefani in line at Ralph's, and I almost killed Zach de la Rocha with a slice of pizza.
Read moreStar Wars VIII Spoilers.
Luke: "No, Ben ... *I* am your father!"
Read moreLotto Assholes.
Be ready for whoever wins that big-ass lottery. Could be Oprah. Or Puck from The Real World. Or your boss. Your junkie cousin. Your ex. Your other ex. Your ex’s ex.
Read morePlease Stop.
Time casts a long shadow, and my memory wears a shaggy beard tangled with alcoholic fuzzery.
Read more(Hopefully) the Last No. 2!
Mallrats 2! Wow! A sequel no one clamored for, coming twenty years after the fact!
Read moreTess the Ghost.
"Where have you been my whole life?"
When a woman starts saying things like this to me, invariably it means she will disappear off the face of the earth very soon.
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